A Personal Solution To A National Problem
Raise your hand if you’re less social today than you were 10+ years ago? If your hand is up, you’re not alone, ironically enough. Far from it.
In news that should apparently resonate with everyone, yet still raise deeply concerning eyebrows, Americans’ daily time spent socializing and communicating declined a staggering -24% from 2012 to 2022, according to the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics American Time Use Survey. Equally alarming, almost every population segment and demographic slice showed declines of at least -15%, while only one (those with earnings in the 50th-75th percentile) increased (by +2%) in that window. Despite variations by gender, age, race, employment status, marital status, and level of education, the underlying story remains the same: We’re far less social, as a country.
In June 2023, I didn’t know this, and I hadn’t spent one minute of my life even thinking about it. All I knew was that my wife and I were finding it more and more difficult to fill our social calendars. We knew people all over the country/world and were in close contact with many, but connections in our own community – the type with whom we might go out to dinner on a Saturday night – were a totally different story.
So, I tried something kind of radical as a little social experiment: I put out a simple call-to-action on social media, asking if anyone was interested in joining my wife and I for dinner at a nearby restaurant. It was only slightly more strange and uncomfortable than walking up to random people on the street and asking them to have dinner with us.
Four brave souls responded and showed up that foggy Monday night. We’d never seen any of them, they’d never seen us, and they’d never seen each other — despite the fact that we were all effectively neighbors. Total and complete strangers. And it was fantastic! The conversation was free-flowing and touched on topics big and small, while perfectly mixing collective table discussions with person-to-person chats – exactly as it would be if we’d hosted a dinner party at our house (with no prep or clean up!). We talked so much, in fact, that the restaurant started closing, before we finished.
When I posted an update on social media about the result of my little experiment, I was floored by the response. More than 60 people instantly pinged me with interest in joining future dinners, all apparently wanting to meet new people in the community, in a casual, low-pressure environment. And that was just the beginning…
Five months and more than 20 experimental dinners later, SIXTOP was born. By making it effortless for people to be social and develop new friendships locally – whether out alone or with a friend, partner, or spouse – our communal dinners offer a small, but meaningful, solution to creating connections that are missing from so many lives.
Right now, SIXTOP only operates in bits and pieces of the San Francisco Bay Area. But, we plan to be part of the “cure” to loneliness in as many communities as possible over time. If you want to help us maximize the impact we know SIXTOP can have, join our effort as a CORE member in current markets, a local Ambassador ready to bring SIXTOP to your area, and/or a restaurant partner anxious to grow with us.
We look forward to seeing you at a table soon!
Cheers!
